BitcrushBaby

I'm the reason why the Gameboy Advance didn't have a dedicated sound-chip. The shit sounded dope and I fucking made Nintendo send that shit out.

I'm the evil bisexual the media warned you about, but you didn't listen and now there's an unspeakable amount of sexual tension between us. You want to be a good person, make your Mom and Dad and your Midwestern Podunk town proud, but my unwillingness to stick to one gender of sexual partner has you intrigued. Nay, fascinated. You have no choice but to fall into my arms and say, "BitcrushBaby... I- I..." You can't take it anymore. The sexual tension has evolved, graduating to dissonance. Like a Jazz saxophonist who has been playing out for the last 13 or so bars, you have to resolve it. You must say the words. "I love you!" The words spill out of you like milk you shouldn't cry over. This is some 1940's drama shit. Casablanca up in this bitch! (idk ive never watched that shit. i like my movies like i like my women. colored.)

I'm the Bitcrush Baby. Huzzah.
Birthday
June 5
Location
the same place as you, your mom's basement!

Signature

Umm... my eyes are up here, y'know. Okay, now stop looking me in the eyes. I'm like a chimpanzee. That shit is a threat. Makin' me itchy and shit.

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